To my beautiful children,
How are you 4 months old already?!!! I don’t even understand how that is happening. The funny thing is that I can totally understand the saying, “the days are long and the years are short.” We pack in a lot in each day. Diaper changes, baths, feedings…we do so much, and yet, I still can’t believe it’s been 4 months. But then again, 4 months seems like such a short time with all that we’ve done including our 5 week NICU stay. Life is crazy. Crazy beautiful, crazy fast, crazy slow, crazy joyous.
We had your 4 months appointment today and I completely forgot that you were getting shots today. Surprise! Oh, my heart sunk. Why? Mama will tell you why. 1 – I hate seeing you cry in pain. Nothing hurts a mama’s heart more! And 2 – I can handle one crying baby. I have two arms. I got that. Two on the other hand? Sometimes I feel like a circus and I pray really hard that I will suddenly sprout a couple extra arms but it hasn’t happened quite yet. Then I really would
be in the circus and you wouldn’t have a mom to take care of you at home so I guess it’s a good thing that perhaps that particular prayer goes unanswered.
Miss Goldie was weighed first and you were an absolute delight, sweet thing. I took off your clothes, changed your poopy diaper and put you on the scale. You basically enjoyed every second! You weigh just under 11 pounds. You are at 1% on the regular growth chart (they switched you over from the preemie chart) but I feel like they really need to compare you to a 2 and half month old because that’s really what you are! When the doctor came in, you giggled for him when he pushed down on your legs to check your hips and giggled again when he checked your ears and mouth. You seriously crack me up, miss priss. You love attention, you love to talk and use your “words,” and I’m pretty sure you know that everyone thinks you’re the cutest thing. Your face lights up when you hear my voice! I walked into your nursery this morning and said, “Good morning, Goldie!” and even before you could see me you got the biggest grin on your face. You smile SO BIG and it just makes my heart burst! I seriously feel like you react to many things including when I tell your brother that he’s cute and that I’m in love with him. You always squawk your disapproval when it’s not you I’m talking about! It cracks me up.
Next, it was Harris’ turn and our big boy weighed 13 pounds. Good job, my boy! Mama loves those chubby little thighs. Goldie was getting a bit upset when it was your turn so I asked the nurse to please put in her binky and then she proceeded to gag then throw up everywhere. Yikes! She has a very strong gag reflex. So, I put on your diaper after getting your weight and I cleaned up the table with the nurse. You are such an absolute delight to be around, my boy. You have big blue eyes and they’re the most innocent eyes I’ve ever seen. That double chin just gets me and I love the sounds you make. You have a signature sound where you squeel from low pitch to high pitch, and then back down and I love it so much! I love that you love to snuggle and your favorite thing in the world is resting your head on either your daddy’s shoulder or mine. That’s where you’re the most calm and relaxed and it often puts you right to sleep. You’ve been that way since we were in the NICU. When you weren’t feeling well, we would do skin to skin and you would immediately fall asleep and still. That precious little body!! I’m so in love with you I can hardly handle it. You have a special, calm spirit.
Goldie was the first to get her shots and the first is an oral shot where they put liquid into your mouth. You were smiling and doing soft little chuckles so much that you wouldn’t swallow! I couldn’t stop laughing. After a couple minutes, though, the shot must have made you gag because you threw up EVERYWHERE again! At this point, I kind of wanted to start crying. To be honest, I totally would have but the nurse was there and I was trying to keep it together. Harris was getting fussy and I thought to myself, “How did I not know that they were going to get shots today?!” I called my mom 3 times in a row and she wouldn’t pick up. I really wanted her to drive an hour down from her house to meet me at my house! I can normally handle you both pretty well, but sometimes I hit a wall and I need some moral support. I was nervous for the day to come with two fussy babies from their shots. After we cleaned up and changed you, the nurse gave you your shots and you cried so I held you and put in your binky. When you calmed down, I switched you for Harris and Harris got his shots and did a great job. He cried much longer afterward though so I held him for about 10 minutes. Whew!!!
My mom was an angel and drove all the way down from her house to spend the day with me. I don’t care how old we are, we always need our mama.
I gave you both a bath last night and I never want to forget how much you two love your baths. I put you in your bath supports and put a little thin blanket on the bottom and top of you to keep you warm and you’re both just as happy as clams. Your sweet little faces looking up at me and being so content and happy makes me so happy!!
I often think throughout the day how unbelievably lucky I am to be your mom. It’s hard, but honestly, I think being your mom is the best job in the entire world and I can’t believe that I really get to spend all day every day with you. I mean, how is it even possible that you two are mine?!! It’s a gift that I can’t even begin to express my gratitude for. Some things are so special that there aren’t words.