To my beautiful children,
I just got back from such an uplifting night. It was just what my soul needed. I’ve felt a little down the last couple of days, kind of fighting harder than normal to be happy; I’m pretty sure it’s the constant nausea and fatigue coupled with the freezing cold and dark, smoggy days. I feel like I had a night full of the sunshine that I desperately needed.
I went to an event for Jane.com where my friend Becki from Whippy Cake spoke about self confidence and being happy with YOU. She talked about taking care of yourself. There was a room full of successful women, and as she asked us all to go around the room and say good qualities about ourselves, it was very apparent to me that we are all the same. We all have insecurities. We all don’t feel good enough sometimes…but we SHOULD because we ARE. We absolutely are. Every one of us. I wanted to write you and remind you to always remember that when you feel unsure, there are millions of other people who feel like you. No one has it totally figured out. You’ll never feel like “you’ve made it” because that’s not what life is supposed to be like, and anyone or anything influencing you to believe that you’re the only one who has doubts is lying to you. You do, however, in your journey, need to remember that at this very moment, you are good enough. Not only that, you are wonderful and incredible. Not tomorrow, when you’ve accomplished this or done that. Today, right this very second. Be easy on yourself.
I want you to remember that life is going to break you down…and then you’ll be built up into a better person. The person that you’re supposed to be. You’re unique, and beautiful, and God has a plan for your special life. He took his time when he made you. How is that not enough?! I think that part of the hard part of life is remembering that. It’s remembering to push aside all of the negative garbage that we allow into our lives to make us think that we aren’t as good as we need to be, and remembering that we were never supposed to be absolutely perfect, and that is God’s absolutely perfect plan for us. We get to experience hard things because when we come out on the other end, we might be bleeding and have bruises and scars, but we are standing. We’ve learned, and stretched, and we’ve grown.
What good quality did I say about myself when my turn came? I’ll admit, I panicked at first. “What am I going to say??” Then it hit me. There are lots of good things about me, and one of them that I’m so proud of is the fact that I can find the good in any situation. I can find the joy in my circumstances…even when giving myself hundreds of shots and having the emotional pain of trying to have children but not being able to. I learning to be happy. I learned to be grateful. It was hard at first and I struggled a lot, but it was really empowering for me to grasp that I can completely control my attitude and perception. Remember that it’s okay to have moments where you let yourself be sad, but always pick yourself back up because there is always some good to find when you look. There is always laughter to be found.
I want you to remember that life is hard, but you are tough, and the situations you are put in were meant for you. You were made for this! When you get to the other side, look back, and I want you to be proud of yourself for making it through and remember what you learned because that is one of life’s greatest gifts. You will learn compassion, empathy, and be given the ability to carry others on their path because of what you have learned on your own path. There is so much beauty in watching others lift you as well.
Please don’t forget to build yourself up. When you look in the mirror, remember to point out the good, and only the good. Please remember that you have a purpose. Be still. When you forget, be still and remember how wonderfully you were created.
I love you, my babies.
xo
Mama
Lexie says
January 20, 2016 at 5:39 pmHey you don't know me but I have followed your journey. we have struggled with infertility for many years. And are going to go and see an infertility dr no because we have had surgery to try and fix the problem. But that didn't do it. We got referred to dr foulk. Do you like him? What insurance do you have that covers ivf?
Jenica Parcell says
January 21, 2016 at 4:56 pmYes I HIGHLY recommend him! I work at a big company called EMC and my insurance is through them 🙂
Anonymous says
January 21, 2016 at 10:53 pmWhat kind of insurance do u have
Jenica Parcell says
January 25, 2016 at 11:42 pmUnited Healthcare
Jill says
January 28, 2016 at 7:10 amIs this the insurance you said covers your IVF cycles? We have UHC too and they said they do not cover infertility for us and we live in Utah.
Jenica Parcell says
January 29, 2016 at 1:13 amIt's because I work at a large corporation called EMC and their insurance is really great 🙂 xo
Anonymous says
January 21, 2016 at 10:53 pmReally nice letter to your children. Ohh and I liked your baby bump picture how u said let's pretend haha
Jenica Parcell says
January 25, 2016 at 11:45 pmThank you!
Michelle Jensen says
January 22, 2016 at 4:29 amI love this great thoughts !!! I'm so happy for you and don't even know you ! There is nothing sweeter than going through this process the whole thing . The sickness . The heartbeats . The stretch marks . And the prize at the end , oh that sweet sweet prize . When you hear those babies cry your heart will burst ! I'm so excited for you . I will keep following you through this adventure ! Congrats Michelle from Mapleton
Jenica Parcell says
January 25, 2016 at 11:45 pmThank you, Michelle! I'm so excited!
Anonymous says
January 23, 2016 at 12:06 amI was just looking at your picture you posted of your bump and your hash tag. It's none of my business but someone just posted on your hash tag thing
Jenica Parcell says
January 25, 2016 at 11:43 pmThank you for telling me! Xo
Michelle Jensen says
January 23, 2016 at 12:30 amSorry it made two comments ? for some reason
Laura says
January 23, 2016 at 8:58 pmJust stumbled across your blog after seeing you in instagram.. SO glad I did! My sweet hubby and I just found out we are expecting TWINS as well–I think we have the same due date! We found out December 28th, too… so, so blessed after a long battle with infertility. I, although, am so so worried that it's just too good to be true! We've only had one ultrasound at 6 weeks. We go again Monday at 8 weeks and I cannot wait! Then, we phase out of our fertility doctor and head to a normal OBGYN. How are you handling the fear and anxiety? You seem so positive and uplifting! I need to just let go and give it all to God but I don't know why I'm so worried! I am excited to follow along with your journey!! My friends say I should start a blog, but I just don't know.. I'm a pretty private person but I also want to remember this journey!!
Jenica Parcell says
January 25, 2016 at 11:45 pmSo exciting! I'm handling it by remembering that I'm literally doing all that I can…my shots, medications, taking care of myself. The rest is in God's hands! Worrying will do harm and not good so I try to remember that 🙂
Vanessa Piot says
January 24, 2016 at 1:21 amBeautifully written, as always! Goodness, I LOVE your posts!!! So happy you had a wonderful and fulfilling night out…pregnancy is a wild ride and sometimes between gnarly hormones and not feeling 100%, we just need a little "pick me up!"
Jenica Parcell says
January 25, 2016 at 11:43 pmThank you so much!! Xo
Anonymous says
January 25, 2016 at 11:51 pmWhen is your next appointment?
Jenica Parcell says
January 27, 2016 at 11:04 pmTonight! xo